What's Next?

Hey there, it's me...

Here's a new blog! Even my wife has been wondering when I would write a new blog entry. Well, I haven't exactly been inspired to write much lately. Jescel and I continue to receive news of events happening with her father in the Philippines, and now with our helper, Marilyn, that has been taking care of him. We had been hoping & praying for a lengthy break from any troublesome news, but last night we found out that Marilyn's father called and wanted her to return home. Apparently her mother is feared to be near death, as her health has been rapidly deteriorating for some time. We are worried for her mother and her family, and since she had to leave suddenly we now have to be concerned about Jescel's Papa, too. Unless we can find someone to help us, Papa will be alone in the house. While he can do some things for himself, he does require help with certain things on a daily basis. It is just not something that we want to think about - The possibility of something else negative happening to Papa, especially after Mama went home to be with the Lord as well as Papa's subsequent surgeries, etc... It really seems like it's one thing after another, truly.

In my mind, I cannot even bring myself to think about dealing with another major life event, like the phone call(s) we received last night. I am really struggling with these things. I am a guy, and I am the one that "fixes" stuff. If it were money issue, I used to be able to work a little overtime. If it were a time issue, I could try to get away from work early. If it were something that required physical strength, I could roll up my sleeves and get to work.

Things have definitely changed. The "overtime" is not there, the "time" itself seems to be slipping away, and "rolling up my sleeves" doesn't seem to help as much as it used to. Basically, as I told Jescel last night, I am at the end of myself at this point. I can't fix these "life" things. I think that we're both at the end of ourselves, wondering whats coming next for us.